Monday, June 11, 2007

I am such a procrastinator...

SO... fellow Bonners, and whoever else decides to read this I guess? This is my first summer post because I am an imbecile when it comes to computers and just now figured it out... actually I'm jinxed and all technology hates me... but that's besides the point.

I moved to Louisville... have my own apartment - 4th street... pretty sweet.
I realized that I am completely dependent on my mother, although I like to pretend I'm independent. For someone who just moved out on their own, I have had some pretty crappy luck. The first day I got here my cell phone broke and I had to go buy a new one.... things such as that... broken car, getting stranded in Waddy, KY because I have no money or no gas, being extremely in debt to my mother, sleeping on the floor of my apartment in Sunil Ramaswamy's sleeping bag... ahhh I'm sorry I'm being such an emo kid.
I guess what I mean to say is: I'm frustrated. I keep thinking of things I need to do... some things I should have done awhile ago... and other things keep popping up...

I feel like I could be doing a better job at my internship with WIT... and I know I will once I get adjusted... but after this weekend (long day Saturday... lots of driving... no reimbursement for gas) I'm questioning it all... like why the hell do I do all this service? As I'm practically an Atheist, I know there's no religious pursuit here. I'm not even that worried at the moment about being a good person. I just do it because... well I don't know, I just always have and I don't know how it started.
Usually I work with kids, and with kids it's easy to see the difference you're making... it's easy to fall in love with them... and I have a very strong nurturing instinct (though that's probably a surprise to most everybody) there's a motherly part to Erica Horton.
Now it's different. I'm working with adults... adults who are poor, lacking resources, and unorganized. People from a completely different world than myself. And it's hard to sense where their coming from sometimes.

A lot of the work I've been doing is office-type stuff... and calling businesses asking for donations for our Atlanta trip. Hey guess what... corporate America is not so generous. at all.... OH wait.. Kroger said they'd give us a $10 gift card... yep.. that's pretty much the success I've had.

I've also heard some pretty intense stories. I spent an hour at a women's house working on an article for our newsletter. She's just joined up with WIT and is working with the CORROC program (Claiming Our Rights, Reclaiming Our Children). She's had 4 daughters removed from her. Her husband had all his children but one removed as well. This couple was extremely angry, yet seemingly very devoted to their faith in God. This woman's 18 year old daughter told the court she wanted to go home... they're permitting her to VISIT... isn't she a legal adult.
The thing is with a lot of these cases, children are removed for "neglect" and that neglect is actually poverty. The children are removed from their homes and often put into much worse situations.

Okay... so if you can't tell I'm a former live-journal-er (told you I was an emo-kid)... and I tend to ramble. So I'm going to end this one here and get back to cha'll later.


1 comment:

Patrick Noltemeyer said...


Thanks for sharing these thoughts. The work you're doing is incredibly valuable and proves to those that you are volunteering with that someone thinks that they are valuable too - by being there, giving of your time, your love, and your talents, you are investing in them in a way that not many others are right now, as you describe in how the children are taken away from their homes. It sounds like the beginning of this experience has been a challenging one, but I hope that it has been an educational one. Even in the midst of poverty and frustration it is amazing to witness the strength of faith and character as you are first hand. Keep up the good work, keep learning, growing and giving - though you may not always understand why you do it, it makes a huge difference in the lives of others.